Leah's story
by LunaBella11
Summary: Leah's point of view, starting in the middle of New Moon then continuing on. First fanfiction. Stephenie Meyer owns everything.
1. A new way

It was like my body was being torn apart, the pain was unbearable. I had never felt anything like it, I thought I was going insane, I was hearing these voices in my head telling me to do things. It wasn't right, I wasn't right.

It finally started to stop, the pain, the agony, but the voices where still there. I stood up slowly starting to stretch, not a good idea, my body writhed in pain making me shake. I walked very slowly to the bathroom door, when I opened it I saw something in the mirror didn't look like myself. I walked slowly yet again out of the bathroom and in to the small living room looking around at my family: Mom, Dad, and Seth, who looked taller like a foot taller. "Leah, how are you?" Dad asked looking like he was about to go off the deep end, "I'm…okay." I responded a little sourly,=2 0it wasn't that I was mad at him, I was more worried than anything else. "Seth, go get Sam and the others." Dad said this still looking at me, I felt like I was under a microscope. "What happened?" I asked dumbfounded, I had no clue what was going on, what was the big deal about me turning in to a werewolf? My dad looked at me shaking his head mostly to himself I believe. Sam and Seth walked in to the house a few minutes later, no one had spoken a single word since Seth had left, it still killed me to see Sam. "Harry, Sue," Sam said nodding recognizing the fact that they where there. "and…Leah, how are you?" Sam asked looking worried, "Why does everyone keep asking me that? It not like you care anyway." I said this last part in hushed tones, "Everyone is asking because what you just went through was extremely painful and agonizing, and were worried." Sam said moving slowly towards me stopping just in front of me putting his finger on my chin pulling my face up to look at him, I shrugged away, then turned and walked out of the room and into mine.

I shut the door and then sat on my bed holding my knees to my chest, after a few minutes I heard a nock on my door. I didn't answer instead I hid my head in between my knees, "Can I come in?" Seth asked, I took a deep breath pulling myself together, "yeah," I said quietly, Seth came through the door and walked to the bed sitting himself at the end of it. "I'm sorry, Sam doesn't know how to deal with this." Seth said, I shuddered slightly at his name, "Deal with what?" I asked looking up at him. "You, something like this has never happened before." Seth said, "What do you mean, it happened to you, it happened to him." I said a little defensively, "Well, its never happened to a girl before." Seth said shrugging, I rolled my eyes.

"Whats the big deal with me being female?"

"Well, its just never happened before."

"Its not that big of a deal."

"Yeah, it is." Seth said his hands balling up into fists, he slowly unclenched them trying to calm down. "How is it a big deal?" I asked as calmly as I could in my current state of being. "It just is, you'll understand sooner or later." Seth said shaking his head, this worried me he very rarely got upset, well before his transformation that is. "Well, is Sam still here?" I asked half heartedly, I really did feel bad about running off like that but I couldn't help it, it felt like I was going to explode. "Yeah, he has to talk to you about some stuff." Seth said standing up, "Do you want me to send him in?" He asked as he walked to the door, I just nodded Seth walked out then Sam walked in. "I'm sorry about earlier." I said looking down at my hands, I really was sorry but I was in my nature to get mad at him, after he turned in to a werewolf he imprinted on my cousin, before he was turned we where in love, deeply and madly in love. "Its fine, are you okay?" He asked walking over and sitting just inches from me, it took everything in my power not to bring up our relationship. "Yeah, just shaken up." I said looking up at him, " Well there are things that we have to go over." He said with a sigh, I was still in love with him even though I wanted to kill him.

"Like?"

"Well, first off the basics."

"What basics?"

"Of being a werewolf." He said, I nodded once and sat at paying attention, I knew this was important so I had to listen to him. "First off, you have to try to control your emotions, which is really hard for me still." He said, I nodded signaling for him to go on, "You have to be careful not to get to mad because you will turn if you do." He said a calmly smiling slightly at me, What?" I asked defensively, "Oh, sorry I didn't mean for it to seem like that, your just taking this really well." He said a tad bit startled, "Its not your fault." I said shrugging, "Then the other problem is that when you phase your clothes literally rip off of you, so if you know your going to phase you need to remove your clothing, this is an issue with most of the early ones." Sam said looking down at his hands, "How would I know when I was phasing?" I asked trying to move the conversation along, "Well you can obviously do it whenever you want, but if you lose control you will start to feel like your going to just burst." Said Sam, I rubbed my arm awkwardly, "When will I have to phase on my own?" I asked curiously, "Well if we need you for getting rid of out enemy, or if we are doing other things that involve phasing, and training so you can learn the basics of being in wolf form." Sam answered a small smile on his face, we sat there in silence for a moment, then I decided to pipe up.

"When will my training start?"

"As soon as possible."

"Why do I need training?"

"Well most of it will be instinct, but some things you have to be taught to do."

"Oh." I said stretching my arms out, "Well I'm ready to start training when you are." I said a small smile on my face, it would be hard to be around him knowing that he would rather be with Emily. Sam stood up, I followed, then I noticed even with the sudden growth spurt he was still taller than me. Then something unexpected happened, he took my hand and pulled me to him, he then hugged me my hands balled up in fists and I started to shake. He let go of me instantly, he muttered "sorry…" I ignored him and stepped away from him.

"Well, um whenever you feel good enough to start training tell me."

"I feel fine now."

"Oh, well then I guess we could start now if you want."

"Yeah that would be nice."

"Okay then," He said looking in to my eyes, Sam then turned away and walked out of the room. I followed him in to the living room where I said good bye to my parents, Seth thought that he would join us in my training.


	2. Embarrased

We started to walk into the woods, I practically lived in the woods when I was younger so I knew my way fairly well, once we had walked for about 10 minutes Sam stopped walking and turned to me. "So I guess the best way to start is for you to phase." Sam said looking over at Seth "Okay…I'll be back" I said a little awkwardly, I walked farther into the woods to the point where I couldn't see them and they couldn't see me. After I had removed my clothing, I tried to phase, the first try didn't work but by the third I phased. I picked up my clothes in my mouth and walked back where the others were, they where both in wolf form, how would we communicate? As I thought this I heard something say like this… I turned my head over to Sam, oh we can hear each others thoughts? Yes, now I want you to run as fast as you can. I then turned and darted forward, it was exhilarating the wind in my hair well I guess it would be fur. I kept running until I heard in my head very good you can stop now it was Sam, I stopped and looked around there bounding along was Seth and Sam. Very good little sis, I didn't expect you to be that fast. I felt good when he said this, it meant I could prove myself, Lets run back and phase so we can discuss other maters. Sam suggested, I immediately took off running until we got back to the spot where we where before. As I stopped running Seth and Sam where coming back, I started to phase back in the middle of phasing I realized something. I wouldn't have my clothes on when I finished phasing, I tried to phase back but it was too late there I was on my hands and knees in the middle of the forest naked. When I got a hold of myself I grabbed my clothes and ran into the forest, not daring to look back.

Once I was dressed and a little less embarrassed I walked back, once I was there I saw Sam and Seth talking away. "Hey sis," Seth said as soon as he saw me, I'm sure I was still beet red. "Well lets head back to my place so we can continue working." Sam suggested as he started to walk back the way we came I started to follow him when Seth grabbed my arm. "Hey, it was no problem that you did that in=2 0front of me, but try to control it around the other guys, I don't need those hormone crazed boys thinking of you in anyway but a sister." Seth said, I rolled my eyes and pulled away from his grasp and started to walk toward Sam, we walked in silence until we got to Sam and Emily's place. We walked inside, Sam went automatically over to Emily and kissed her I felt extremely uncomfortable I felt like I wanted to rip off Sam's head, I could feel my heart rate accelerating, and then it happened I phased without wanting. I was in control enough to walk out of the door still in wolf form, I didn't care that my clothes where in there or that they where ripped to shreds all I cared about was the fact that my cousin was kissing the man I loved. I ran into the forest trying to clear my mind, the running seemed to help, but not enough to calm me all the way down I finally just decided to lay down on the forest floor. After five minutes of me laying there Seth walked up to me, I turned my head away he sat next to me and stroked my fur.

"Are you okay."

I shrugged

"They feel really bad you know."

I sat my head down on my paws.

"Well, Emily wanted me to bring you these." Seth sat a pair of black shorts and a red tee shirt next to me, he stood up and started to walk away. Once he was out of sight I phased back and changed my clothes, and started to walk back to Sam and Emily's house. I opened the door and walked in not bothering to nock, I turned to find Emily and Sam sitting at the small table in the kitchen. "I'm sorry about earlier…" I mumbled quietly, Sam got up from his chair and smiled, "its okay, it's a perfectly normal reaction when you're this young." As Sam said this my blood started to boil again, "Uh, I have to go," As soon as I said this I sprinted out of the door and ran to my house slamming the door behind me as I went inside. I walked to my room and slammed the door, I sat on my bed snuggled in my blanket against the wall.


	3. My dad, Harry Clearwater

**AN: Hey readers, I am so excited that people are actually reading this story, I'm going to update it with what I have done. This chapter is very sad so just fair warning I cried when I wrote it. **

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I had no idea what time it was and how long I had been asleep but I could tell that something was wrong. I got up and walked out of my room and into the kitchen where I found a note from Mom it read:

_Leah, _

_I tried to wake, you but you wouldn't get up. Your fathers in the hospital, you need to come when you get this, I'm really worried about him. _

_Love, _

_Mom_

I put on the first pair of shoes I could find and ran out the door and to the car, I jumped in turned the key and sped out onto the road following the highway to the hospital. It didn't take me long to get there, once I was there I was taken to where my mom, brother, Billy, Charlie, and Sam was. "Mom what happened?" I asked in complete hysterics, "He had a heart attack." My mom said with a blank face, "Is he going to be alright?" I blubbered, "I honestly don't know."

I had never heard my mom like this before, I slid down the wall looking straight ahead I could feel the hot tears fall down my face. It was a long few hours, a lot of waiting and wondering if he was going to be alright, but then we where all in the room with him. I was in the corner I couldn't stand seeing him that way, the beeping on the monitor started to slow and then it was just one loud annoying beep, doctors and nurses rushed in trying to save him but it was to late.

There I sat in the corner holding my knees letting the tears roll down my face, he was too young, there was so much he was going to miss, so much I couldn't bear to see him die. I closed my eyes and covered my ears trying to drown out the sounds of everything around me, I'm not sure how long I sat there but the next thing I knew I was lifted off the ground. I didn't even bother to see who it was or to protest there was no point anyway I was too out of it to walk anyway. I started to open my eyes, I saw the bedroom wall wait was all of this was a dream? Dads okay, he's probably in the living room right now, I hopped up and ran into the living room to see my mom sitting alone in the dark tears dripping from her eyes. That's when I knew that I wasn't dreaming, everything came at me at once, the hysterics, the long annoying beep, and being carried out of the hospital in strong arms. I walked over and sat by may mom letting her cry in my shoulder, no words where spoken, and I was fine with that. We both fell asleep on the couch crying in each others shoulders, when I woke I stood up walked into the bathroom.

I felt like a zombie, I probably looked like one to I couldn't really feel anything. After I showered and looked decent, I knew that it was time for the funeral but I couldn't think to myself that this was the last time I would ever see my dad in person. I hadn't talked to anyone since he died I couldn't talk, it was like my tongue was ripped out, at the funeral I literally sat there staring at him not doing anything else. After it was over and everyone had said there goodbyes me, my mom, and my brother rode home alone without the normal driver, Harry Clearwater, my dad.

We spent the majority of the day our separate ways, me in my room, Seth with my mom for some time and then in his own room. I couldn't stand being around my mom when she was sad, because it put me in a place that I wasn't used to, I can't be in that place again.

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**AN: Hope you enjoyed it, so please review!**


	4. Training

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah." I was expecting Seth but, as I turned my head Sam walked through the door. "How ya holding up?" Sam asked as he walked over to where I was laying down on my bed, he sat next to me. "Not really holding up to well, but overall okay." I mumbled, I felt his hand on my shoulder, it felt nice I wish it would stay there forever. I sat up slowly, and looked up at him, "Emily had me bring over some food, do you want any?" He asked looking in my tearstained eyes, I shook my head. "How's Emily?" I asked trying to sound nice, "She's okay, she's worried about you all though." Sam said calmly, last time we talked about Emily I wasn't exactly kind so he was saying this as nicely as possible. "So this is probably the last thing on your mind but we have some news, we picked up a trail about 5 miles away we think it could be the one we where looking for, we could use your help if your up for it." Sam said obviously trying to get off of the previous subject, "Sure sounds good to me." I responded with a small smile, "We first have to introduce you to the pack." Sam said, "I already know everyone though." I said a little confused, "I mean as a wolf, a part of the pack, that sort of thing." Sam said nodding, "What is it, some kind of initiation ceremony?" I asked a little sourly, why did things have to always be so difficult? "Well it kind of is, but its more of an introduction into the werewolf world than anything else." Sam said kindly.

"Okay then, when does it start."

"Whenever your ready."

"Well I'm ready now."

"Are you sure your up for it?"

"You do know who your talking to right?" I asked sarcastically with the biggest smile I had given him in a very long time. "I just want to make sure your up for it." He said raising his hands up a little in surrender, I just smirked. "So is this in wolf form or in human form?" I asked a little curiously, "Well usually both but in this particular case probably just wolf." Sam said a little oddly, why would it be any different? Then it came to me because I was a girl, it really shouldn't mater that much, "Whatever." I said rolling my eyes slightly, "Fine we can do it both if you really want that." Sam said shrugging, I rolled my eyes again. "It isn't that its just the fact that this particular case means because your female, its just annoying." I said vaguely, "Well that may be true, but still its whatever you want, and not what Paul wants." He mumbled the last part quietly, I gave a half smile and a roll of my eyes. "Well I want to start now." I said trying to sound as happy as possible, "Okay then I'll go get everyone, meet me in the same spot as last time in about 15 minutes." After Sam said this he stood up and walked out of my room, I quickly changed out of my pajama bottoms and put on black shorts, and a orange tee. I was slightly nervous about being a werewolf but it would be second nature right, I hope so…

Fifteen minutes later I was in the same spot in the forest, I didn't know if I should phase or not so I stayed in human form for the time being. I started to hear foot steps and I spun around and there was Sam, Seth, Embry, Jared, Paul, and a very aggravated looking Jacob. "Hey Leah." Sam said as he made his way over, "Hey." I said a little bitterly, "Well should we get started?" Sam asked looking around, I shrugged "Sure." The others seemed to be keeping a distance, what was I some kind of fatal disease? "Well I guess we should start in human form then." Sam suggested, the others started walking forward into a kind of circle, I was between Seth and Jacob. Sam started to talk about being a wolf, the normal stuff we went over, and a few new points and then he said "Now we will phase." I instantly started to walk into the forest, this was going to be awkward, as soon as I phased "_We are going to take a run going Eastward, I'll tell you when to stop_." I nodded and I took off running to the East, then I started to hear voices in my head again, "_why in the world do we have to deal with her?" "Uh I don't know but this is going to be so much more confusing with her around."_ Jared and Paul, of course I was offended so I retorted "_Oh really, you don't think I can just be one of the guys? Or is it that I will slow you all down? Well either way your very wrong." _I took off at double the speed I was before, Leah you can stop running now, so I stopped running and looked around the others where at least half a mile behind me. They all ran until they reached where I was laying resting my head on my crossed paws, "_look what the wolf dragged in_," I thought sarcastically. I got exasperated looks and a few not so nice thoughts in my head then I heard Seth telling them to "_shut up_." "_Well Leah, now that you have been acquainted to being a werewolf, we need your help to try and find the enemy." _I nodded at Sam , I took a deep breath and could smell something horrid. "_Well that was fast_," I looked over at Seth and watched him start to run towards the scent, I followed.

For about an hour that's what we did running after the scent, but after it was apparent we had lost the trail we headed back to where our clothes where. Once I got my clothes I bounded off towards the forest once I thought I was deep enough in I phased and got dressed as I headed back I heard barks and howls I started to run. Once I got there I saw Seth and Jared rolling around in wolf form fighting, "Whoa, what's going on?" I yelled to Sam as I ran over to him "STOP IT!" I yelled at Seth and Jared who where still going at it. "They got in to an um…fight." Sam said his arms crossed, "You just have to let them battle it out." Sam looked over at me, the two began to slow down and slowly they stopped then they phased, in front of me, not something I wanted to see. "Uh…" Then Idashed off into the woods, I'm sure that everything was going to be fine but it was still embarrassing. About five minutes later I saw Seth walking up to me "Are you okay?" I asked worriedly, I didn't care if he was a werewolf he was still my little brother, and I didn't want him to be hurt. "I'm fine, now Jared on the other hand." Seth said shaking his head, "Why where you guys fighting?" I asked curiously, "Its nothing." He responded, I raised one eyebrow "It sure didn't look that way." Seth rolled his eyes "He just said something he shouldn't have said." I nodded, I knew I would find out sooner or later. We walked back to where the rest of the pack was, Jared looked up "Sorry, bout that…" He said I just looked away, it really didn't bother me that I saw him naked, I knew that someone would slip up at some point.


	5. Oh no he didn't!

**AN:** **Hello lovely readers, I am going to try and add everything I have written today, as soon as I reach 6,000 words I'm going to need a beta.**

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We agreed that we would meet up tomorrow morning around 5:00 am at Sam's place, all the others had shifts where they would run around trying to catch the scent, but because I was new they didn't want me to do that yet. I stumbled out of bed throwing on a pair of sweats and made my way over to Sam's house Seth had the last shift so he was still out, I didn't bother knocking on the door so I just walked in. On the couch I saw Jacob sitting there alone, "Hey," I said with a small smile, he looked exhausted, "Hi, Leah." I walked over and sat next to him, I saw Sam over in the kitchen I didn't even bother with him any more.

"How are you holding up?" He asked me obviously disinterested, "I'm fine." I said crossing my arms over my chest and tapping my foot to keep myself awake, about five minutes later everyone was there. Sam started to speak "Well yesterday went fairly well, last night we think we may have caught a new trail, but with the bloodsucker in town we can't tell." I sat up a little, "Which bloodsucker?" I asked trying to look more interested than I was, "The one who can see the future." Sam said quietly, I resented Jacob for hanging out with Bella but this was just wrong.

After Bella went through everything when the bloodsuckers left I couldn't imagine going through that again, wait I could every time I saw Sam, I have absolutely no sympathy for anyone right now. "Well I guess we should go and get started." Sam said as I was coming out of my mind and back into reality, I stood up and followed the rest of them out of the house. We made our way through the forest, going to the same small space as the last times, as they started to take off any pieces of clothing they actually had on, I made my way over into the forest where I phased and got my clothes and ran back to the group. "_Were going to do the same thing as yesterday sound good?"_ Everyone nodded, and as Sam took off running so did we, as I was running I saw something in my head I knew I wasn't thinking of, myself in the woods after I had phased. Damn it. Jared. I quickly took a right turn running until I hit him, then I started to fight him, he was fighting back but I had an edge on him. Then I started to hear in my head: "_Whoa what got in to those two?" "Its official Leah is insane!"_ We went at this until he finally stopped fighting and I heard in my head: "_fine you win!" _

I got up from him and backed away slowly turning and running away, I wasn't in the mood to be yelled at by a bunch of boys. On the way back I could hear: Why did you do that? You brought this on yourself. She got you good. I smiled at the last comment I paid any attention to, I wanted him to be hurt. I got back to the meeting spot I phased changed and started to walk back to Sam's place, even though I rarely would talk to Emily anymore I thought I would pay her a visit. I let myself in for the second time that day, I immediately smelled blueberries. "Emily?" I said quietly as I walked in, and there she was putting muffins on a plate, "Hey, Leah!" Emily said a little too cheery for my taste, "How are you?" Emily asked smiling, "Not so great." I said letting a small smile fall on to my face, as I sat down in a chair in the kitchen.

"Whats wrong?"

"I kinda got mad, at someone."

"Who?"

"Jared."

"What did he do?"

"Well lets just say he saw more than he needed to of me and he decided to think about it."

I said rolling my eyes in disgust, Emily had an apologetic look on her face "I'm sorry, I admire you, I have no idea how I would deal being the only girl." Emily said shaking her head, this was something I didn't expect to hear, so therefore I didn't know how to react to it. We spent the next few minutes chit chatting, or shall I rephrase Emily chatting and me making little comments at the appropriate times. Then the guys came in I crossed my arms and tried not to pay attention to them, still talking to Emily, but I knew I should join them so they knew I wasn't going to go crazy again. But who knows maybe I will go crazy again, I finally got up and went into the tiny living room and sat down on the floor cross legged and leaning against a wall I probably looked mad, but I was. I sat there for an immeasurable amount of time before I came out of the daze, and looked over to the rest of the group, who where all eating muffins. Then I heard Paul start to talk. "So, Leah"

"Yeah?"

"When is Jared's next butt kicking going to be?"

"Jared got the point."

"But still when?"

"Well yours might come faster than his if you don't stop." I retorted, Paul looked like he had been slapped, I loved it. "Whoa were scared." The guys said in unison, I rolled my eyes, "Try me, see how long it takes for your head to get ripped off." I said raising one eyebrow with my hands on my hips. I didn't know when I stood up but I was standing now, they looked like they were going to bust out laughing. Sam didn't he looked like he was worried, Paul then started to crack up, I was put over the edge. I ran out of the house as fast as I possibly could. I took deep breaths trying to calm myself down, it was helping slightly but I was still ready to rip off Paul s limbs, which I was sure was a down step to what I was going to do to Jared before everyone else showed up.

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**AN: Okay so sorry for another short chapter but there is much more to come!**


	6. Like a Coma

**AN: Kind of a short chapter but…. It is a very sad chapter, I would recommend listening to Stay by Safetysuit while reading this.**

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I just kept walking, I didn't care how far away I was, if I needed to get back quickly I could phase. As I was walking that blackness came, the blackness that found me when Sam left. Those two weeks I was a complete wreck, and then when Emily came and he left me for good. I started to feel tears fall down my face, this rarely happened, I had taught myself not to cry when I thought about him.

The pain he made me feel was unbearable, worse than unbearable, it could have easily made me want to die. Sam was the only thing in my world, then when he stopped loving me, my world stopped. By now I was in full fledged hysterics, sitting in the forest hugging my knees to my chest, trying to pull myself together. About an hour later I finally had gotten myself to a point where I could go back, everyone had probably gone back home by now. I walked toward my house not bothering to interrupt whatever was going on at Sam and Emily's place, I walked through the front door and smelled something weird. "Mom?" I asked, it smelled like food but she hadn't cooked since Dad past away and I didn't expect her to start back up anytime soon.

"I'm in here!"

"The kitchen?"

"Yeah, come here."

"Coming." I made my way towards the kitchen, and there was my mom standing over the stove, stirring some kind of concoction. "Mom?" I said trying to get her attention, "Oh, Leah!" She jumped a little and then ran over and hugged me, this was odd she was cheery. "I have a surprise for you." She said as she gestured towards the stove, "Smells good." I said with a small smile trying to be happy. "It's grandma's pasta casserole, your favorite." As mom said this, her smile started to fade, it had been five years since grandma died, but it was still hard on her. Mom talked through most of dinner and I listened as I ate, and ate, and ate. I found it odd that I was so hungry, I had never been this hungry before I was changed.

After a few hours, it was Seth's shift, he wouldn't let me do it for him, he hadn't slept in days and it was showing. Because he wouldn't let me do it for him or come, I thought I would sneak out and follow him, I didn't want him to get to exhausted. As soon as I phased and started to follow him I had to try to keep my mind as quiet as possible, he would figure out that I was following him eventually, but for the time being I wanted to keep out of his way.

It was nearly impossible to keep my mind quiet, I thought I was doing fairly well until I heard "_Leah go home!" _Seth said annoyed, "_No you go home and sleep you need it more than me, understand?" "No…Am I going to have to drag you back home? Or will you go willingly?" "FINE I'm going I'm going." _

So I bounded into the forest changing my clothes, sulking back home I started to notice the forest around me the dark and the light fighting against each other, and before I knew it darkness ensued. I could feel the flashback coming on even though I tried to out run it…

"Leah, I need to talk to you." Sam and I were sitting on the beach the same spot as always, in complete seclusion. "Go ahead," I said with a small smile, he moved a piece of hair out of my face, he was frowning. Frowning was not unusual for Sam since he went away, it confused me. "Leah, you know that I love you, you know I always will, but…" He trailed off, my mind went blank, "But, what? What are you saying?" I asked shocked I could feel the tears well up behind my eyes, "But I'm not being fair to you, there is someone else, someone I can't live without." The tears escaped my eyes "Who is it?" I yelled nearly hyperventilating "Emily…" He whispered I swore for a moment that I had blacked out, then my subconscious took over I grabbed a sharp stone that was laying next me and I threw it at his face with as much strength as I had. I then stood and ran, before long I remembered my promise bracelet I ripped it off of me and threw it down to the ground. I ran and ran until I got home I ripped open the door tears continuing to fall, I ignored the yelling from my parents asking the obvious questions. I went to my room where she was, sitting by the window doodling on her notebook, I ripped it out of her hands. "What was that for?" She asked worriedly, "Get. Out. Now!" I screamed hitting her with the notebook, she ran out as I fell to the floor passing out.

Coming out of the flashback was like coming out of a coma, or at least that was the comparison I had to give myself to keep going.

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**AN: So it was a short chapter but I will be posting all day!**


	7. Weddings and werewolves don't mix

**AN: SO Sorry I didn't update yesterday or the day before but I'm actually having to revise a lot of the writing in the up coming chapters. So here is Chapter 7!**

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I walked in to the house and oddly enough, Sam was there speaking to my mother. I could feel myself slipping in to blackness, I ran to my room just as my clothes began to rip off of me, I phased. As I quickly phased back, there was a nock on my door I phased back "Don't come in!" I shouted trying to find my clothes my room was unnaturally tidy, mom must have brought her cleaning spree to my room. I yanked a drawer open grabbing a t-shirt, just as I began yanking it on the door slowly opened.

"Mom please get out!" I yelled, as the blood began to boil under my skin, the door quickly slammed without a word, that was not like mom. I pulled on a pair of shorts, and walked out into the living room. "What the hell is this?" I asked looking at the wall not wanting to meet either of their eyes, Emily then walked in. "Leah!" she said running over to me in her little peppy way, pulling me into a hug I did not want to give. She then pushed a basket into my hands, out of curiosity I looked in the perfect little basket. Inside where perfect little muffins and cupcakes from my perfect sister, err I mean cousin ugh.

"So will you?" Asked Emily excitedly

"Will I what?"

"Be in the wedding?"

_Crap_

"Um… I don't know if that would be such a great idea Emily."

"Oh, please for me?" She said with that damn little sad face, I looked over at Sam who was staring at Emily, of course. "What ever." I said with a little sourness in my tone.

"Really?" Emily ran over and practically tackled me in a hug. I patted her back the universal sign of get the hell off of me, right? She just hugged me tighter, I rolled my eyes. She finally let go, "Well the first dress fitting is next Saturday at my house at noon, I guess I will see you there." She said smiling like the goof ball that she is, I nodded with what I hoped looked like a smile but it was probably more of a grimace.

I checked the time, it was 8:55 we were supposed to meet at 9 so I ran to the spot in the fore st, we were supposed to be in human form so I resisted the urge to rip off Sam's head when I saw him in the clearing, alone.

He was just standing there in nothing but an old pair of cut off shorts, it made me uncomfortable, as a went to walk away Jacob Black in the same fashion was walking towards me. I knew I wouldn't be able to get out of the meeting now, "Leah." Jacob said acknowledging my existence, "What do you want?" I asked angrily, he chuckled behind him was the rest of the pack including Seth. As Jared walked by I stopped him "Just FYI if you ever do that again, your going to lose a leg understand?" I said with my hands on my hips making it perfectly clear, he walked away with his hands up in surrender, as he walked away I saw a small smirk on his face. That put me over the edge and I phased right there, Damn it, that's going to get old fast. The others just snickered, now that my clothes where destroyed I had no choice but to stay in wolf form. "Um Leah, we weren't going into wolf form tonight." Said a snide looking Paul, I'd show him and just like that I pounced on him and began biting everywhere and anywhere I could. I heard yelling in the back ground but I didn't care. Once I was done I phase back, fully aware that I wouldn't have anything on, it was mainly to torture Sam than anything. I stood up from the crouched position and then put on my best 'F. U.' smile, and walked away. Once I had retrieved some clothes to put on I went back to the little clearing. "Hello Boys." I said indifferently, they all looked up at me at the same time all of them but one with there mouths hanging open like the dogs they are. All of them except for Sam he didn't look surprised one bit, and there Paul sat clutching certain 'parts' of his body that where currently healing, I giggled. Me, Leah Clearwater, little miss hateful, was giggling.

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**AN: Hope you all enjoyed that as much as I did! I had a few requests for a Paul but kicking! SOOOO please review it would mean a lot because I have a ton more hits than reviews so add me to your alerts list and review, review, review! ALSO I need a BETA!!!!!!!!!!!!!**


	8. Coltsfeet

The past few weeks had passed quickly, with the return of the local bloodsuckers we were on patrol constantly. I had literally gotten about 4 hours of sleep this past week, it sucked. The only thing that kept me going was the shear fact that because of the threat I didn't have to deal with any wedding plans.

_Leah?_

_Sam, what do you want?_

_Go take a break._

_No, I'm fine._

_I don't care if your fine, I want you to be perfect._

_Well haven't you noticed I'll never be perfect enough for you._

_Leah, not now._

_Fine!_

I phased back, incredibly annoyed I pulled on my sun dress and walked back to the house, I went through the front door not my usual entrance, but I could care less. As I walked in I could hear a high pitched giggle, Emily. I turned around to sneak back out the door, "Oh Leah!" Yelled my mother who was obviously trying to kill me! "Leah, come help us pick out Emily's flowers for the wedding." She said happily, I walked in to the rectangular kitchen slowly and then sat down at the small table. "So Leah, what do you think about daisies for the wedding?" Emily asked kindly, I smiled lightly, "Well, if you want to be traditional its perfect, but if you want people to remember your flowers I would pick Coltsfeet, very unusual!" I pretended to gush. It wasn't long until we had ordered the flowers, the flowers Sam had given me on every date we had.

Several weeks had passed, we had to keep patrolling every night it was getting so old! The wedding was actually moved up because of the threat, something about if Sam was to die Emily wants to be eternally tied to him, uh a total load of crap if you ask me. I was at the final dress fitting, the dress was a purple strapless, floor length number that accentuated my body very nicely. Since I had suggested that Emily should use yellow Coltsfeet for her flowers the colors had become yellow and purple.

"Come out already!"

"Leah, I'm scared."

"What?" I half yelled in the small dress shop where the alterations where being made, "I said I'm scared." She said quietly, oh you have to be kidding me! "Why in the world are you scared?" I asked with a large sigh, "That I don't look okay in the dress." She said with a little sob, I opened the door to the small dressing room, there Emily stood in all her bridal glory looking perfect as usual, I walked over to her and hugged her. Something I had never voluntarily done since Sam imprinted, but I hated to see Emily cry. "Emily you look beautiful." I said sternly when was she going to get it through her head that Sam would like her in a G-String. Well come to think of it he would probably enjoyed that more than this get-up. Her dress was a simple, virgin white, sweetheart cut with a bit of lace at the bust, it was in one word, flawless. She had decided that I would do her hair and make-up, much to my resentment.

The next few days went by slowly with minimal patrol for me, per request of Emily, I was actually grateful for this. I was sure no one in the pack wanted to hear what had been going through my head, thoughts of when me and Sam had been together, the good times.

"Are you ready for me to lace it up?"

"Um, I guess?"

"You okay?"

"I think so." Emily's nerves where almost unbearable, I kind of had a need to slap her, but I resisted the urge. I began to lace up her corset, when I reached the top I tied the delicate bow the designer of the dress taught me to tie. I handed her the bouquet, with the beautiful yellow flowers perfectly arranged in it. I took a deep breath and began to walk out of the house to the beach where the ceremony was being performed.

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**AN: SO sorry for another short chapter! But I am writing the wedding tonight! Happy Fourth to those who celebrate it also, I will have links to the dresses on my profile! AND!!!! The flower Coltsfeet means JUSTICE! So there is a reason behind that flower!**


	9. Weddings

AN: THIS IS IT, this is the wedding, the new and improved wedding.

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**Since the wedding date had to change, I was the only bridesmaid. As I began to walk down the aisle, I could see from my peripheral vision the majority of the boys and men there staring at me. I could care less, as I looked up at Sam I could feel a tear fall down my cheek, there he was in a perfectly simple tux, My Sam. I was supposed to be marring him today not her. I got to my spot quickly, not daring to look straight in to his eyes again. He had chosen Jake as his best man, I had to say he cleaned up well. **

**It was a very short ceremony, that is until the kiss that lasted so long I finally said, "Oh come on a minister is on the premises, get a room!" Getting many laughs from the crowd, even Sam let out a chuckle, when he finally broke the kiss he winked at me, causing another single tear to fall down my face. The reception was at a small hotel that overlooked the beach, I sat at my seat with the rest of the small wedding party, dreading my upcoming speech. Jake made his first it was the usual blabber about how great they are together, when he was done I shot back the rest of my 2nd**** champagne the I stood up and began.**

"**Hi, um for the few of you who don't know me I'm Leah, Emily's cousin and Sam's friend," I continued "I have known these two since I was born, Emily and I have been more like sisters over the years, when I found out these two were going to get married, I was needless to say shocked. And when Emily asked me to be a bridesmaid I was even more shocked, and reluctant at first. But as the time went on I began to remember when we were little and we would pretend that we where getting married, and it was a great thing for us to get even closer." I could hear awes "What I am trying to say is although reluctant at first, I am truly glad I got to help Emily my sister who I love, congratulations to the happy couple, the two most important people in my life happy that's all I want." I said the last part earnestly "OH and how does everyone like the flowers, that was one thing I did pick out!" I took a sip of my champagne, I savored the taste. **

**I could hear Sam speaking. "Here's to my beautiful wife Emily, the women who never stopped loving me." It was hard for me to hear that even though I knew he would never me mine. "I love you both." I whispered sincerely, Emily looked over and hugged me tightly, Sam looked at me and scanned me up and down.**

**The wedding continued on as planned but, before long we started to have karaoke, the entire tribe except for me sang "I'm too sexy," while Sam took off Emily's garter, the other thing I picked out for her. Emily had asked me to sing for her and Sam's first dance, the song: Our Song- Taylor Swift. I loved the song, but it seemed to cutesy to be a first dance song but I agreed. **

**I walked up to the microphone, "Would Sam and Emily please come to the dance floor for their first dance as husband and wife." I said as kindly as I could. One the got there I heard the music and began to sing:**

**I was riding shotgun with my hair undone in the front seat of his carHe's got a one-hand feel on the steering wheelThe other on my heartI look around, turn the radio downHe says baby is something wrong?I say nothing I was just thinking how we don't have a songAnd he says...**

**Our song is the slamming screen doors,Sneakin' out late, tapping on your windowWhen we're on the phone and you talk real slow'cause it's late and your mama don't knowOur song is the way you laughThe first date "man, I didn't kiss her, and I should have"And when I got home ... before I said amenAsking God if he could play it again**

**I was walking up the front porch steps after everything that dayHad gone all wrong and been trampled onAnd lost and thrown awayGot to the hallway, well on my way to my lovin' bedI almost didn't notice all the rosesAnd the note that said...**

**Our song is the slamming screen doors,Sneakin' out late, tapping on your windowWhen we're on the phone and you talk real slow'cause it's late and your mama don't knowOur song is the way you laughThe first date "man, I didn't kiss her, and I should have"And when I got home ... before I said amenAsking God if he could play it again**

**I've heard every album, listened to the radioWaited for something to come alongThat was as good as our song...Cause**

**Our song is the slamming screen doors,Sneakin' out late, tapping on his windowWhen where on the phone and he talks real slow'cause it's late and his mama don't knowOur song is the way he laughsThe first date "man, I didn't kiss him, and I should have"And when I got home ... before I said amenAsking God if he could play it again**

**I was riding shotgun with my hair undoneIn the front seat of his carI grabbed a pen and an old napkinAnd I wrote down our song**

**As I finished singing the song, I roar of applause erupted I looked up to see Sam and Emily making out. Great! As I went to step off of the little platform Jake hoped up and whispered in my ear "lets do a duet." He said chuckling slightly, then I heard the beginnings of a solo song "All Summer Long" by Kid Rock. I knew this was going to be a long night of music I didn't like.**

**After about three more songs it was time for the cake, they stuffed it in each others faces laughing and then, Sam proceeded to kiss it off of her, what was with these two! When they broke the kiss, Sam left his forehead on Emily's and looked in to her eyes, exactly like he used to when we were together. It became to much and I had to run out of there as fast as I could without being noticed. I ran into the ladies room, and fell on the floor, there I was laying on the floor crying, something I do not do. I was there crying like the annoying blonde from Grey's Anatomy, at least she had a good reason, the love of her life had died. In a way Sam had just died, it was an odd feeling, I began to laugh. Why did I care so damn much, they'll be happy I told myself over and over again. **

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**AN: So there's the wedding that I actually liked**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: HEY GUYS! Yes, I do realize it has been like 11 months 2 weeks and 2 days since I put up a new chapter and I have absolutely no excuse SO sorry! ****L So here is the next chapter!**

It had been a few weeks since the wedding, and Sam's and Leah's honeymoon was cut short because of a threat from the bloodsuckers. So yet again I was constantly in wolf form, which I do enjoy from time to time but spending 36 hours with a tail really sucks. But it was my day off, finally it was about damn time, oh come on seriously someones knocking on my door doesn't the world know this is Leah day? Uhh, I should probably open the damn interrupting door now.

"Hey Leah?"

"Jacob, what do you want?" I groaned

"I was looking for Seth, he didn't show up this morning."

"What do you mean he didn't show up, he left at like 5." Seriously, little bro you decide not to show up and worry me to death today? "Well have you checked Sam's?" I asked casually, as I stood there still my pajama's. "Yeah, he's not there either." He said a little sourly, "Okay give me a second and we can go look for him, by the way why isn't Sam the one who's freaking out about Seth?" I asked going behind a wall throwing on an old pair of shorts and a T-shirt. "I'd rather not talk about it." Well that's strange.

"Why not?"

"I just don't okay?"

"Sam piss you off?"

"I guess."

"Welcome to the club!" I chuckled slightly, he made this face showing his disapproval.

"What's your problem?" I asked slightly offended.

"I'm not the one who's got the problem that's you." He said somewhat earnestly, I looked at him oddly, then we heard it Sam's howl beckoning us. We ran out of the house finding our respective places in the woods and phased.

_Okay, we've got a lead about 6 miles West, Jake you and Leah go straight West the rest of us will be coming up from behind. _

Sam's words pounded in my head as Jake and I began to run as fast as we could, making good time the trail was strong and had to be fairly recent within the hour. As we ran all of a sudden Seth's voice was back out of the blue, the pack was questioning he just said he would explain later. The pack just kept running and running getting closer and closer then it was gone, just like that.

"There had to be a car waiting." I suggested when we were back at Sam's place, to pull ourselves back together. Seth hadn't come over something about getting new clothes or something, he was acting really strange, definitely unlike Seth. No one really spoke we all just kinda sat there eating the food Emily had put out for us, slowly one by one every one made their excuses and left. Until it was just Jake, Sam, and I, not wanting to be stuck with Sam I stood up and bounded out of the house without a word. I took my time on my way home feeling the cold air woosh past my slightly outstretched arms. I had done this when I was a child, it had been years since I truly enjoyed nature. I stood there literally giggling, I haven't giggled for about 2 years since Emily came around that one fateful day. I heard a shuffle from behind me and a short snort. I turned around and saw Jacob, "A word of this to anyone and you will end up worse than Jared, Get it?" I said as smiled sweetly. "Got it" Jacob said holding in his laughter, "Good." and with that I ran off.

**So, I have already started the next chapter I hope you guys can forgive m J**


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